the hermit is not about being physically alone, we all know you can be in a room ful of people and alone in the universe. the hermit is about a quest for truth, wisdom, and for gay men oftentimes acceptance and self love. sometimes the search can become frantic, i'm sure we all know someone who moves from relationship to relationship, failure to failure because they choose the same dynamic time after time. that's because until you love yourself 100% unconditonally you can't truly love another. often times we're so afraid to be alone because looking in makes us confront those demons we've kept buried for so long. the picked on boy in gym, the fat kid no one liked, the disappointment your family covered you in, religious sins, etc etc. and i'm here to tell you you can have 100 lovers, and 1000 tricks, and be the life of every party and still not love yourself. it's a lesson i personally had to deal with. anytime anyone was attracted to me in anything other than purely physical i freaked and drove them quickly away. i didnt feel i deserved to be loved, after all i'm an abomination right? lol
good golly i wish i'd have embraced the hermit 20 years earlier because he teaches you that all the answers we frantically seek from the world around us are within you already. you must shine the light inward into those dark buried recesses of your soul, mayhaps not visited in decades for it is there that the truth lies. the answers to all your problems has always been you. do not shy away from doin this highly personal work, you must examine everything warts and all, dear heart simply let it go and let God/Spirit if it's something beyond your control. we do not have the right to judge others and they have no right to judge you so just be sure what you do is of your higher good. you deserve to be happy and whole and even if you're alone on the top of a mountain you ARE the world and that IS enough!
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